I can't quite describe the effect your words have on me, Chloe - they always run so deep they almost ache to read and I see life, death, existing, with a new clarity for just a moment. Thank you for sharing your open sternum, and all it contains within, with us. "The universe is under no obligation to make sense to me" - words I will hold close.
I couldn’t have worded it better. I will add that I close my eyes and squint as I listen to Chloe’s words, as if doing so will conjure up a magic carpet to take me to the haven where these words are created. What a gift!
Delightful and thought-provoking reflections dear Chloe Hope. You said it beautifully - "existence forms a web, not a ladder". Being a Nature Educator who struggles to convince youngsters that Life evolved and co-evolved through inter-relationships and inter-dependence and obligatory symbiotic relationships that lead to a form of inter-being where all is one and one is all, your deep reflections are so enriching and redeeming. Love and prayers and longings for more from you. Santhi
I. Can't. Even. How do you do this every time? Make my heart stop and race all at once? It must be all those tiny birds living inside of your heart, because they do the same for me. Such loveliness here, friend. So grateful for you and your words in this world.
Whenever I see your byline my heart leaps a bit and I have to steady myself for what will come next, as surely as nightfall and sunrise. Sometimes it's tears, sometimes just pure gaping awe. Thank you
I recognize that armor, dear Chloe. And the trap of feeling protected but also cut off from the wonder and beauty of the world. Thank you for showing the way home. Your image reminds me of this poem that came to me in the days after my father’s death.
The knight
by Rainer Maria Rilke
The knight rides forth in coal-black steel
into the teaming world.
Outside his armor everything is there: sunlight and valley,
Chloe - how is it that you can peer into MY soul, effortlessly articulating feelings I struggle to find words for? Or is it that you’ve tapped into humanity’s most pressing question: what is life? I think it’s a little of both. But your thoughts land hard, though welcomed, because my sternum is also exposed. Thank you.
Amazing, Chloe. Your writing rattled the latches of more than one door that are barricades against looking and challenging the still out of tune parts of my life. My living.
Chloe, the blue painted scene in your bedroom with your Mom. Oh my. I feel this in so many ways. My Mom has been gone for 53 plus years now. I miss her still. Her last day on earth remains vivid in my mind. Autumn too, is my season. Those silver birches sound exquisite. I am especially grateful you read your pieces. Your voice never fails to ease my heart and soothe my soul. Deepest thanks for all you share.
I wore that armour for years until a near-death experience and a hospital stay ten years ago had me cast it aside. Although I'm privileged to be at an age and in a place where I can curate much of my interaction with the world, I'm still tempted sometimes to reach for the armour. But then, I'd miss so much, including the pain and beauty of your writing as you bare your soul, and ours.
Thank you, Chloe, for the beauty of your words and for your tender, open heart. May the glimmers glow brighter and fill our world with light. There is always hope, as there is always love and beauty, however dark it becomes.
I can't quite describe the effect your words have on me, Chloe - they always run so deep they almost ache to read and I see life, death, existing, with a new clarity for just a moment. Thank you for sharing your open sternum, and all it contains within, with us. "The universe is under no obligation to make sense to me" - words I will hold close.
I very much appreciate your generosity, Rebecca. And you not shying away from my open sternum ;) x
I couldn’t have worded it better. I will add that I close my eyes and squint as I listen to Chloe’s words, as if doing so will conjure up a magic carpet to take me to the haven where these words are created. What a gift!
Juliette, I'll be keeping an eye out for you and your carpet from now on :)
Yes, this refrain touched me too.
❤️
Delightful and thought-provoking reflections dear Chloe Hope. You said it beautifully - "existence forms a web, not a ladder". Being a Nature Educator who struggles to convince youngsters that Life evolved and co-evolved through inter-relationships and inter-dependence and obligatory symbiotic relationships that lead to a form of inter-being where all is one and one is all, your deep reflections are so enriching and redeeming. Love and prayers and longings for more from you. Santhi
It sounds like you're doing extremely important work, Santhi, and I thank you for it. Love and prayers to you.
I. Can't. Even. How do you do this every time? Make my heart stop and race all at once? It must be all those tiny birds living inside of your heart, because they do the same for me. Such loveliness here, friend. So grateful for you and your words in this world.
So grateful for you, Laura B :)
We must capitalize Life as readily as we do death. Otherwise the armor grows yearly and the chaffinch hungers. Beautiful essay Chloe.
And the last thing anyone wants is a hungry Chaffinch. Thank you, Michael :)
Whenever I see your byline my heart leaps a bit and I have to steady myself for what will come next, as surely as nightfall and sunrise. Sometimes it's tears, sometimes just pure gaping awe. Thank you
Sarah, thank you, so much.
I recognize that armor, dear Chloe. And the trap of feeling protected but also cut off from the wonder and beauty of the world. Thank you for showing the way home. Your image reminds me of this poem that came to me in the days after my father’s death.
The knight
by Rainer Maria Rilke
The knight rides forth in coal-black steel
into the teaming world.
Outside his armor everything is there: sunlight and valley,
friend and foe and feast,
May, maiden, forest and grail,
and God himself in a thousand forms
to be found along every road.
But inside the armor darkly enclosing him
crouches death. And the thought comes
and comes again:
when will the blade
pierce this iron sheath,
the undeserved and liberating blade
that will fetch me from my hiding place
where I’ve been so long compressed –
So that, at last, I may stretch my limbs
and hear my full voice.
from “Book of Images”
Thank you for this, Julie. Rilke never fails to land, ever.
Yeah, he was part angel.
No doubt
Absolutely beautiful. I will be looking for the embers…you just filled my ribs with their light.
We must, we must ✨
Chloe - how is it that you can peer into MY soul, effortlessly articulating feelings I struggle to find words for? Or is it that you’ve tapped into humanity’s most pressing question: what is life? I think it’s a little of both. But your thoughts land hard, though welcomed, because my sternum is also exposed. Thank you.
Dear, dear Beth. You are fiercely kind, thank you. And thank you for your open sternum, also.
Amazing, Chloe. Your writing rattled the latches of more than one door that are barricades against looking and challenging the still out of tune parts of my life. My living.
I am very, very glad to hear that, Gary. Thank you.
Chloe, the blue painted scene in your bedroom with your Mom. Oh my. I feel this in so many ways. My Mom has been gone for 53 plus years now. I miss her still. Her last day on earth remains vivid in my mind. Autumn too, is my season. Those silver birches sound exquisite. I am especially grateful you read your pieces. Your voice never fails to ease my heart and soothe my soul. Deepest thanks for all you share.
Julia, I appreciate you sharing, and I'm so glad to know you listen. Deepest thanks to you. I hope you're finding embers in the Autumn.
Oh, Chloe, you said this so beautifully.
I wore that armour for years until a near-death experience and a hospital stay ten years ago had me cast it aside. Although I'm privileged to be at an age and in a place where I can curate much of my interaction with the world, I'm still tempted sometimes to reach for the armour. But then, I'd miss so much, including the pain and beauty of your writing as you bare your soul, and ours.
Thank you for being an ember.
Oh John, thank you. And yes, nothing like an NDE to cast off the armour! I appreciate you living without it, regardless of the temptation.
“Wow, you poured yourself into that…” and so, I must surrender these defences. ❤️
My motto has become, “I am here. What am I going to do about it?”
As you so poetically stated, the Universe feels no particular compulsion to make sense to us. 🤷🏻♀️
An excellent question to ponder. Thank you ❤️
“To sign up for Life and check all the boxes.”
☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ⚰️🌌
Thank you, Chloe, for the beauty of your words and for your tender, open heart. May the glimmers glow brighter and fill our world with light. There is always hope, as there is always love and beauty, however dark it becomes.
Thank you, Josie, for your fiercely kind wishes.
grief and praise, beautifully articulated. boundless gratitude.
And to you, Maia
I find myself in the dark a lot these days trying to find the breath to blow on those embers. Thank you for another post that urges me to keep trying.
Sincerely hoping that your embers are well protected, Ben ❤️